I’m just gonna start by stating the obvious: I’m not a fan of Montreal. I don’t mean the team. I mean the city. I’ve been there twice, and each time sucked. The closest I’ve ever come to a legit fist-fight was in this town. I’m not sure what the deal is, but Montreal and I are 0 for 2. In fact, I can pretty much do without most of the entire province of Québec. A famous insult comic and I share the same opinion on this issue.
Because of this unfortunate situation, I’ve deferred all input for this travel guide to someone who knows the city well. He’s Canadian. He speaks French (as most Canadians do, thanks to socialist education and dual-language laws). While born in Vancouver, he spent many years (including the formative college ones) back east among the Québécois. Oh yeah, he produced a few records you might’ve heard.
Here’s punk rock producer superstar Steve Kravac’s guide to Montreal.
Best dive bar: St-Laurent Bifteck
This is the formerly-punk-rock-now-hipster hangout on what we call “the main,” or St. Laurent Street. Always cheap. Be sure to try a pitcher of the local (not so micro) brew Boreale. It’s a mainly English speaking hang.
Best Smoked Meat Sandwiches: Schwartz’s Montreal Hebrew Delicatessen
The smoked meat on rye sandwich is the cornerstone of Montreal dining. Schwartz’s deli serves the quintessential version. Celine Dion is buying the place. Hopefully she leaves everything as is and goes back to Vegas.
Best Cheap Breakfast: Dusty’s
Dusty’s serves up the amazing breakfast and the fresh squeezed orange juice is awesome. Love the home fries! Perfect to nurse your hangover.
Best Bagel: St-Viateur Bagel
Bagels fresh from a wood fired oven 24 hours a day, 7 days week. What could be better? These may be the best in North America.
